The Devil Went Darn To Barnsley .​.​.​and other stories

by The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican

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released October 31, 2014

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The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican UK

Hailing from Barnsley Rock City in't north, The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican are determined to follow in their father's immortal footsteps. They naturally began to perform other famous people’s songs complete with lyrics about life in't North and to complete their squeaky-clean image, they became instantly recognisable for their immaculate hair and their stylish dress-sense.
EY UP! LET'S GO!
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Track Name: The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican & Friends - The Devil Went Darn To Barnsley
Lyrics by Scott Doonican
Music by Charlie Daniels, Tom Crain, Taz DiGregorio, Fred Edwards, Charles Hayward, James W. Marshall

The Devil went darn to Barnsley Tarn
He war lookin' for a soul to steal.
He war in a bind 'cos he war way behind
And he war willin' to mek a deal
When he came across this young ’un
Laikin’ on t’fiddle and playin’ shit ‘ot.
Well the Devil jumped up like a big daft lump, he said,
"Ey up, I’ll tell thee what.
I guess you didn't know it, but I'm a fiddle player, too.
And if you'd care, to tek a dare, I'll mek a bet with you.
Now, you play pretty good fiddle, lad, but I’m gunna mek thee see.
I'll bet a fiddle of gold against yer soul,
‘Coz I think I'm better than thee."
The lad said, "My name's Björn, and it might be a sin.
But I'll take your bet, you big red get
'Coz I'm t’best that's ever bin!"

Björn you better get yer bow and play your fiddle hard,
'Coz hell's brok loose in Barnsley Tarn and t’Devil deals the cards.
And if you win you get this shiny fiddle med of gold.
But if you lose, the Devil gets yer soul.

The Devil got his fiddle and he said, "Reight, off we go!"
And fire flew from his fingertips and he put on quite a show
And then he brought in Graham from Saxon, and Eliza Carthy as well
These strangers in’t night, they din’t sound shite
No, they rocked like bloody hell!

When the Devil finished, Björn just said, "Thar pretty good, t’old lad,
But sit darn ovver theer for a bit and I’ll mek thee look reight bad.”

A Doonican frum Sweden livin’ in t‘Tarn
I’ll show you what’s t’crack, I’m t’best ararnd
T’Devil’s goin’ darn ‘coz he’s Number 1
Playing them hits with The Bar-Steward Sons

The Devil bowed his head because he knew that he’d bin beat.
And he laid that golden fiddle on’t ground at Björn’s feet.
Björn said, "Devil, just come on back if thy ivver wants to try ageeain.
'Cos I told you once, you big daft chuff, I'm t’best that’s ever bin!"

A Doonican frum Sweden livin’ in t‘Tarn
I’ll show you what’s t’crack, I’m t’best ararnd
T’Devil’s goin’ darn ‘coz he’s Number 1
Playing them hits with The Bar-Steward Sons
Track Name: Scott Doonican: Bar-Steward Unplugged - The Number Of The Beast
Written by Steve Harris
Track Name: Scott Doonican: Bar-Steward Unplugged - Red Right Hand
Written by Mick Harvey, Nick Cave & Thomas Wydler
Track Name: Scott Doonican: Bar-Steward Unplugged - Devil Gate Drive
Written by Nicky Chinn & Mike Chapman

Well, at the age of five they can do their jive
Down in Devil Gate Drive
And at the age of six they're gonna get their kicks
Down in Devil Gate Drive
Well your mama don't know where your sister done go
She's gone down to the Drive. She's the start of the show
And let her move on up. Let her come let her go.
She can jive
Down in Devil Gate Drive

So come alive. Come alive
Down in Devil Gate Drive
So come alive. Come alive
Down in Devil Gate... Down in Devil Gate
Down in Devil Gate Drive
Down in Devil Gate... Down in Devil Gate
Down in Devil Gate Drive

When they reach their teens,
That's when they all get mean
Down in Devil Gate Drive
When she was sweet sixteen
She was the jukebox queen
Down in Devil Gate Drive
She led the angel pack on the road to sin
Knock down the gates!
Let me in. Let me in
Don't mess me 'round, cause you know where I've been
To 'The Dive' down in Devil Gate Drive

CHORUS

Well your mama don't know where your sister done go
She goes down to the Drive. She's the start of the show
Let her move on up. Let her come let her go.
She can jive
Down in Devil Gate Drive

CHORUS x 2
Track Name: Scott Doonican: Bar-Steward Unplugged - N.I.B.
Written by Geezer Butler, Tony Iommi, Ozzy Osbourne & Bill Ward

Some people say my love cannot be true
please believe me, my love, and I'll show you
I will give you those things you thought unreal
The sun, the moon, the stars all bear my seal

Follow me now and you will not regret
leaving the life you led before we met
You are the first to have this love of mine
forever with me 'till the end of time

Your love for me has just got to be real
before you know the way I'm going to feel
I'm going to feel
I'm going to feel

Now I have you with me, under my power
Our love grows stronger now with every hour
Look into my eyes, you'll see who I am
my name is Lucifer, please take my hand

Follow me now and you will not regret
leaving the life you led before we met
You are the first to have this love of mine
forever with me 'till the end of time

Your love for me has just got to be real
before you know the way I'm going to feel
I'm going to feel
I'm going to feel

Now I have you with me, under my power
Our love grows stronger now with every hour
Look into my eyes, you'll see who I am
my name is Lucifer, please take my hand
Track Name: Scott Doonican: Bar-Steward Unplugged - Devil's Haircut
Written by Beck Hansen, John King & Michael Simpson

Something's wrong 'cause my mind is fading
And everywhere I look
There's a dead end waiting
Temperature's dropping at the rotten oasis
Stealing kisses from the leperous faces

Heads are hanging from the garbage man trees
Mouthwash jukebox gasoline
pistols are pointing
At a poor man's pockets
Smiling eyes ripping out of his sockets

Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind

Love machines on the sympathy crutches
Discount orgies on the dropout buses
Hitching a ride with the bleeding noses
Coming to town with the brief case blues

Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind

Something's wrong 'cause my mind is fading
Ghetto-blasting disintegrating
Rock 'n' roll, know what I'm saying
And everywhere I look
There's a dead end waiting

Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Got a devil's haircut in my mind
Track Name: Scott Doonican: Bar-Steward Unplugged - Hey Satan You Rock
Written by Andrew James Cairns, Martin McCarrick, Neil Cooper & Michael McKeegan

Wanna spend my whole life drunk
Never wanna give a fuck
Wanna walk through gates of Heaven
Backstage pass in hand

St. Peter, park my car
There's angels on my mind
Fix me up some manna
Where do you keep the wine?

Put Venom on the jukebox
Postcards to hell
Hey Satan, you rock
Get me Mary, she's a fox
Postcards to hell
Hey Satan, you rock

Hey Satan, you rock

Wanna spend my whole life drunk
Never wanna give a fuck
Wanna walk through gates of Heaven
Backstage pass in hand

St. Peter, park my car
There's angels on my mind
Fix me up some manna
Where do you keep the wine?

Stick Venom on the jukebox
Postcards to hell
Hey Satan, you rock
Get me Mary, she's a fox
Postcards to hell
Hey Satan, you rock

Hey Satan, you rock