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lyrics

All The Dinner Ladies
(Lyrics: S.Doonican/A.White)

All the dinner ladies  (All the dinner ladies)
All the dinner ladies  (All the dinner ladies)
All the dinner ladies  (All the dinner ladies)
All the dinner ladies  -  Now put your hands up
 
They’re giving us grub, just served up
Sausage, mash-spuds and peas
The bigger kids, are getting first dibs
There’s bugger all left for me
Dun’t mek ‘em cross, ‘cos they’re the boss
And you’ll only end up in detention
They’ve been there for years, it’ll end in tears
They’re meaner than Mohammed Ali
 
They’ve got gravy but it’s allus got a skin on it
They’ve got gravy but it’s allus got a skin on it
You mightn’t like it, cos it’s gonna have a skin on it
They’ve got gravy but it’s allus got a skin on it
 
Oh, no, no - No, no, no, no, no, no - No, no, no
Oh, no, no - No, no, no, no, no, no - No, no, no

They’ve got gravy but it’s allus got a skin on it
They’ve got gravy but it’s allus got a skin on it
You mightn’t like it, cos it’s gonna have a skin on it
They’ve got gravy but it’s allus got a skin on it
 
Serving rock hard chips, can’t get to grips
With cauliflower cheese or stir-fry
But dun’t act up, they’ll mess you up
After giving you the evil eye
Stop chatting, just eat! Stay in your seat!
You better be paying attention!
It’ll only get worse, if you aven’t ‘ad yer firsts
You can kiss yer afters goodbye
 
Bringing custard but it’s allus got a skin on it
Bringing custard but it’s allus got a skin on it
You may like it, but it’s gonna have a skin on it
Bringing custard but it’s allus got a skin on it
 
Oh, no, no - No, no, no, no, no, no - No, no, no
Oh, no, no - No, no, no, no, no, no - No, no, no

Take your trays and go and scrape ‘em in the bin, poppet
Take your trays and go and scrape ‘em in the bin, poppet
And if you spill, they’ll keep you in until they can mop it
Take your trays and go and scrape ‘em in the bin, poppet

Out you go
Go, go, go, go, go, go
Go, go, go

Out you go
Go, go, go, go, go, go
Go, go, go

Out you go
Go, go, go, go, go, go
Go, go, go

Out you go
Go, go, go, go, go, go
Go, go, go

They’ll blow the whistle and it allus got a string on it
They’ll blow the whistle and it allus got a string on it
When the bell goes it’s allus got a ring on it
They’ll blow the whistle and it allus got a string on it
 
If it’s spitting then they’re gonna get you in for it
If it’s spitting then they’re gonna get you in for it
If you act silly in the classroom then you’re in for it
If it’s spitting then they’re gonna get you in for it
 
Oh no no

credits

from 'Ave It : Bold As Brass (2017), released June 17, 2017

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The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican UK

Hailing from Barnsley, The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican are Britain's hardest working comedy band. Having played over 1,100 anarchic live shows to date, they are instantly recognisable for their immaculate hair and their stylish dress-sense. The have been critically acclaimed to be the UK festival scene's undisputed Kings of Parody. ... more

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