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Lyrics: Prof. Chris Sammon / Scott Doonican

lyrics

She's from Dodworth - thinks she’s looking good
Her Sanskrit tattoos are misunderstood
Wears an Oompa Loompa fake tan when she’s on the lash
While a carefully-placed vagazzle hides her shaving rash

Wears a onesie to her local pub at half past 8
And anyone who looks at her she wants to feight
20 aifs of cider she's a total wreck
She tumbles off her stool and nearly breaks her neck

She also nicks consumer products from the Tarn
An i-phone 6, an e-cig and a dressing gown
Judge Rinder stopped her claim against the Aldi there
Cos the cucumber she took back looked quite worse for wear

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The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican UK

Hailing from Barnsley, The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican are Britain's hardest working comedy band. Having played over 1,100 anarchic live shows to date, they are instantly recognisable for their immaculate hair and their stylish dress-sense. The have been critically acclaimed to be the UK festival scene's undisputed Kings of Parody. ... more

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