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lyrics

Talk Reight You Idiot
Lyrics: Scott Doonican / Alan Doonican #2 / Bjorn Doonicansson / Andy Doonican
 
All the chavvy youths of today
Can’t understand what they’re on about
They all speak quick, say they’re ‘sick’
What do they mean? I can’t figure out
It’s a bizarre slang... what's YOLO?
You say that you’re only living once
Try telling that to Sean Bean
He'll prove you wrong from the ambulance
You’re-a-chump – go and pull your pants up
(way up, way up, waaaay uuup)…    
And talk reight, you idiot
 
You’re acting like you’re from ‘Da Hood’
But you’re about as hard as balsa wood
You lol and lol, as you’re trolling
Cameron and Paul Hollywood
You add 'and ting' to everything
Do ‘ya think that you’re Jamaic-i-an?
The truth is that you come frum t’Tarn
You’re whiter than Michael Jackson
You’re-a-chump – go and pull your pants up
(way up, way up, waaaay uuup)…    
And talk reight, you idiot
 
You say you're going to the ‘Mall’
It's Morrisons, you're not Eminem
Get all your gear from Pri-mar-ni
To hang like Kim Kardashian
You Snap-Chat from the changing room
To yer bestie, chillin’ in her crib
Asking "Does my bum look big in this?"
She’s dissin’ you, ‘cos she said it did
All the stupid kids high on ket
What happened to smoking cigarettes?
And they exclaim “I’m bare vexed...
Don't ask me bruv or I'll shank you next!”
You’re-a-chump – go and pull your pants up
(way up, way up, waaaay uuup)…    
And talk reight, you idiot

credits

from T'South 0 - Tarn 4 (2016), released May 11, 2016

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The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican UK

Hailing from Barnsley, The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican are Britain's hardest working comedy band. Having played over 1,100 anarchic live shows to date, they are instantly recognisable for their immaculate hair and their stylish dress-sense. The have been critically acclaimed to be the UK festival scene's undisputed Kings of Parody. ... more

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