Name: The Bar Of The Old No. 7
Duration: P00H05M15S
Description: Lyrics: C. Sammon

The Bar Of The Old No. 7

from Talk Of The Tarn (2014) by The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican

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Lyrics: C. Sammon

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The Bar Of The Old No. 7
Lyrics: Chris Sammon

There’s a lass some lads know dressed in glitter and gold
At the bar of the Old No. 7
As she stands there unsure, fancies whisky liqueur
Checks the optics to spot what she came for
Ooh, at the bar of the Old No. 7

With her glass in her hand, seems she’s hatching a plan
Keep your eyes down in case you’re her target
Oh my word don't look now, she’s got an arse like a cow
That’s been fed and then led to the market
Ooh, she’s got thighs of thunder

There’s a feeling I’ve got, like I’m abart to be shot
And my spirit is there for the crushing
And before me I see, things that terrify me
While the whole pub’s stood laughing and looking
Ooh, she’s got thighs of thunder

And it’s whispered that soon she'll bend me like a spoon
In the hands of that man Yuri Geller
And I’m trapped by the door and then pinned to the wall
Christ, she’s strong she’s got a grip like a fella!

I felt a bustle darn in me hedgerow and I’m alarmed now
She’s up for taking me and breaking me
There’s only one way this’ll end and it’s not a good one
There’s no time to change the road I’m on
In her thighs of thunder

My head is drumming; don’t want to go,
In case you dun’t know
She’s dragged me out by the wheelie bins
Dear lady I can feel the wind blow, and it won’t grow
Oh Christ, she’s going to duff me in!

The punters peer in from the road,
At this lad without his clothes
And the lady wants to know
Why there’s not that much to show
I guess it’s not so rock and roll,
‘cos in the winter it’s damn cold
And the beer has taken hold,
And if you listen very hard
You’ll hear the laughter in the yard,
At the bar of the Old No. 7

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from Talk Of The Tarn (2014), released May 25, 2014

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The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican UK

Hailing from Barnsley, The Bar-Steward Sons of Val Doonican are Britain's hardest working comedy band. Having played over 1,100 anarchic live shows to date, they are instantly recognisable for their immaculate hair and their stylish dress-sense. The have been critically acclaimed to be the UK festival scene's undisputed Kings of Parody. ... more

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